it’s been a while since i’ve posted a for really reals type post. so i guess i should probably do that.
(well, i say that. but the truth is that i’m really posting here as opposed to my “real” blog because only about five of you read this versus the hundreds that read that one. barf.)
today begins the season of lent — the season of self-denial and reflection as we walk toward the cross. each year before this one, it’s been obvious to me the things i should fast throughout the lenten season:
- fast food
- junk food
- vain beauty practices
- me, me, me, etc. etc. etc.
this year, it wasn’t so obvious. as a matter of fact, until about an hour ago, i didn’t know what God wanted me to this year.
but as i was sitting in my cubicle, getting ready to tackle today’s to-do list, God laid my special not-at-all-lindsay-centered lenten path upon my heart as heavy as a sack of bricks.
oh the weight of it is crushing. oh the weight.
i am an insolent child, violently kicking and screaming and pounding on my heavy chest with fear and self-loathing.
for the first time on my walk, i will not tell a soul (not even my husband) about the specifics of my lenten journey. i will fast and pray and give in secret for forty days (and possibly beyond.)
we have come from dust, and to dust we shall return.