fueled by diet coke

i tore and/or sprained a ligament in my knee last wednesday. the healing process is of an “undetermined” length of time which scares me. i’m scared that i will never dance again. that i will never run again. that i will never be able to walk without pain again. i realize i’m probably overreacting but for someone so active, this is agonizing.

the saddest part of it all? the thing i’m MOST terrified of is getting fat in the months i’m laid out.

i’m so angry about that.

trying to be something you’re not is as stupid as peeing on yourself.

Text

2 years ago | Tags: life truth fueled by diet coke self-love self esteem

The first time I remember comparing myself to others and trying to change to be like them was a complete disaster.

I was around four or five years old. I grew up the only girl in my family, surrounded by a brother and endless boy cousins including my cousin and best friend Brian. Since Brian and I were so close in age and in relationship, we were practically joined at the hip. Everything was fine and good, except for one thing: Brian peed standing up. So did the rest of my cousins and my brother. I didn’t understand why I was trained to pee sitting down. Even though I was obviously an anatomical outsider, I hated feeling like I was different from Brian and the rest of my family members. I was convinced that even though everyone called me a girl, I could be a boy if I wanted to. All I had to do was pee standing up. Then I could be just like everyone else.

How hard could it be? I mean, it seemed pretty straight forward. So I marched into my mother’s bathroom, closed the door, pulled down my pants, faced the toilet, and went.

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Quote

2 years ago | Tags: life truth sex and the city carrie bradshaw love yourself self love | Notes: 1

"But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that’s just fabulous."

- Sex and the City (via carlinmichelle)

Source: carlinmichelle

why write? because, quite simply, it isn't there.

Posts Tagged: truth

"It hurts just to wake up whenever you’re wearing thin. Alone on the outside, so tired of looking in. The end is uncertain and I’ve never been so afraid. But I don’t need a telescope to see that there’s hope and that makes me feel brave."

"Revenge is essentially saying to God, ‘You are in my seat.’"

"The reason that art is valuable is precisely why I can’t tell you how to do it. If there were a map, there’d be no art, because art is the act of navigating without a map."

"Instead of striving for a higher position, more power, and more influence, Jesus moves from the heights to the depths, from victory to defeat, from riches to poverty, from triumphs to suffering, from life to depth."

"We don’t forgive people because they deserve it. We forgive them because they need it—because we need it."

"But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that’s just fabulous."

"It hurts just to wake up whenever you’re wearing thin.
Alone on the outside, so tired of looking in.
The end is uncertain and I’ve never been so afraid.
But I don’t need a telescope to see that there’s hope
and that makes me feel brave."